Friday, 26 February 2016

English Alternative assessment corrections by Valerie Tan(6)

English Alternative assessment corrections

         Little Joe always dreamed of being a hero, like a firefighter who was respected for saving victims from the fiery cauldron of flames. Despite being the scrawniest boy in class, Little Joe always held on to this dream.
         As time flew by, Little Joe had grown bigger, but not much, and always lost to his peers regarding stature. But Joe rose above all when it came to intellect.
         Joe eventually became a professor at the New Technology University where the latest virtual reality technologies were used to enhance his teaching.    
        It happened to be a day where Joe was about to read an article called ‘The Vacuum’. After ten minutes of reading, Joe noticed tendrils of smoke coming from outside the window and it attracted his attention.  What lay before him was a terrible sight.
         The building opposite was completely engulfed in flames. It turned out that an experiment involving diesel, a flammable substance, had gone wrong! The inferno ate up everything mercilessly in its path, slowly heading towards Joe. Joe was stunned and had no idea what to do. The roar of the fire soon shook him back to reality and decided to escape from the menacing fire.
         When Joe finally got out of the building, he noticed that the flames had already engulfed half the school compound. The school supposedly was equipped with anti-fire technology, but what he saw was otherwise. That was when the article he was reading, ‘ The Vacuum’ came to his mind. That was it. He had to create a vacuum to stop the fire. Without oxygen,  the fire would not be able to burn. Joe needed to get his message across fast, so he whipped out his tablet and soon managed to connect to everyone on the school compound.
        “ Attention all..” His voice echoed across the school.
         Joe’s plan was to go at a high speed on the levitation train that encircled the whole school to create a difference in the air pressure. This would create a vacuum to put out the fire.
        Joe sprinted to the train. He found a few students who wanted to help and they quickly boarded the train. As the students tried to hack into the train’s system, Joe could feel his heart palpitating rapidly. His mouth was dry, but forehead was wet with perspiration. “What if my idea doesn't work?” he asked himself.
       With a deep breath, Joe started the train, frequently signalling to the students to increase the speed slowly. The train so fast until it was nothing but a blur. The people on the train hoped and prayed that the idea would work. To their amazement, the flames started to die out and was soon reduced to ash. Joe could not believe his eyes; he had saved the school!
       The train reduced speed and eventually came to a stop. Joe and the students brimmed with pride and stepped out the train and was cheered on by dozens of people. Joe could see the gratitude in them. Nothing could replace that feeling.
       Joe was a hero.

Somebody called Joe,
Wanted to be a hero,
But was too scrawny to save anyone,
So he became the best professor in University,
Then a fire broke out; he used a vacuum to put out the fire  

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